Hello, I am Buster, and today I will be reading an excerpt from the best-selling book “Finding Homes for Adorable Fluffy Little White Dogs,” from the sound stage at Animal Friends Connection Humane Society in Lodi, California.
Ahem… here we go:
“First, select a photo of the adorable fluffy little white dog.
“Next, ask the adorable fluffy little white dog to concentrate very hard on what he most wants in a new home, such as a quiet lap and a loving hand as you snooze by the fire, or a retired couple who have nothing to do all day but pet and love him.
“The adorable fluffy little white dog should now focus on how happy he will be when he’s in this new home, and how much he will love his new family, and how much joy he will bring them.
“Once the transcriber has received the adorable fluffy little white dog’s thoughts, they should be typed up on a popular social media platform.
“Along with the cute photo of the adorable white fluffy little dog, these thoughts and any incidental data — such as the fact that he is 2 years old and weighs 11 pounds — will guarantee huge amounts of sharing and interest, resulting very shortly in the successful and happy adoption of the adorable fluffy little white dog.”
Sigh, wasn’t that a beeeeyouteeeeful story?
It’s only missing one thing: A happy ending! Make it happen for me, please!
You can read more about me, and see more photos, here:
Questions? Email my foster mom at firstname.lastname@example.org.